The ultimate point of dating and having relationships are to get married. President Thomas S. Monson stated that the decision to ask his future wife to marry him was perhaps the most important decison that I have ever made. President Hinckley stated That is will be the most important decision of your life, the individual whom you marry.
How does one choose this?
Awareness and Acquaintance Phase: Most ask if people are attractive to us. Elder Bruce R. McConkie stated that natural and wholesome and normal affection that should exist does exist. Physical attractiveness is a necessary part of attraction it's not the most important factor. Some have found that most people are able to gather enough information to determine whether another person was interested in further pursuing the relationship.
Buildup: the first date helps move us into this phase. Elder Oakes famously defines a date as 1 planned ahead, 2 paid for (by the man), and 3 paired off. Most now choose to become friends before moving into this phase though.
There are two processes:
Seeking Mutual influence Which many would state is harder if the relationship starts out as physical instead of as friends and then moving into the friends.
Developing mature love: Mature love is what leads to support successful marriages.
Continuation: The decision to stay together and pursue an eternal marriage is a difficult one. We need to make the decision to do this instead of sliding into this choice making rash choices.
When we are deciding to make this choice we should make sure to ask for guidance from our parents and to make sure we seek a spiritual confirmation as this is a decision that once finalized will last into eternity.
The continuation phase also includes the process of preparing for marriage, as the marriage does last longer then the actual wedding day. Realize why we are doing this and what we want out of our marriage should be our ultimate goal during the engagement phase.
Deterioration and Ending of: These can be the most difficult stages to phase. I have never personally gone through this as Tim was my first boyfriend. To go through these stages we should go about interestingly the same way as we go about deciding to stay in a relationship and get married. To pray and seek guidance from our Heavenly Father to make sure we can cause the least amount of pain to someone we no longer feel compatible with.
Successful Marriages and Families Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives Alan J Hawkins et al Chapter 2 pg 16-21
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